They way that we cope with anxiety can lead to us to an infinite loop of avoidance and anxiety symptoms. Much like the game Whack-a-mole, you never really win, the game just gets faster and faster, it is similar with anxiety. The more we try to get rid of the symptoms, such as avoiding triggering events, the more anxiety comes back. Before we put "strategies" in place to manage anxiety, it is helpful to understand the purpose of the anxiety. Anxiety is our brain's way of trying to help warn us of danger, but often in an unsophisticated way. What is our body trying to tell us? Maybe we are misinterpreting the information from our body. Our body is reacting in a way to prevent us from being hurt by something "dangerous", which might not be dangerous at all. Our body might be giving us information that this upcoming event is important to us, and we want to try our best, so we are feeling anxious in anticipation. Once we start to shift our awareness to understanding that we are a person who is having anxious thoughts, and that this is our brain's way of trying to help us, we can start to make different choices on how to manage the anxiety.

When we make important changes in our lives, we often experience uncertainty about the outcome and naturally feelings of anxiety. Those anxious feelings can come from a combination of our brain trying to problem solve all the possible outcomes without all of the information, seeing uncertainty as frightening or dangerous, or not feeling confident in our ability to cope with the change. When we are faced with uncertainty, we can feel out of control, and sometimes to try and get rid of these uncomfortable thoughts and feelings, we look to gain control, often by making impulsive decisions. In this video, Clinical Psychologist Michael discusses some of the reasons behind this discomfort with uncertainty, and offers some tips on how to manage our feelings without making impulsive decisions that may cause more problems in the long run.

Paralysis by Analysis occurs in times when we are feeling uncertain, and we are trying to gain more information in order to make a decision. Because of our anxiety about the unknown, we end up being overwhelmed by too much information and effectively become paralysed by indecision. In this video, Clinical Psychologist Michael discusses Paralysis by Analysis and offers some ways of managing feelings of uncertainty and anxiety in order to move forward with our decisions.

By focusing on the process (the journey) rather than the outcome (the destination), we are more likely to achieve success and improve performance. This is particularly useful when we have core beliefs that activate feelings of shame. If we only focus on the outcome, we tend to avoid or overcompensate and burnout, in order to prevent the feelings of shame arising. This goes for all aspects of our lives and here, Clinical Psychologist Michael talks about creating an 8/10 day in order to bring our attention to the process, and that leads to more long-term success

Humans are geared to be pessimistic and avoid danger. It's good for our survival as a species. However, modern humans now interpret anxiety, with deep internal messages of shame (not being good enough/not worthwhile), as being fearful, and naturally we want to run away from these 'dangers'. In this video, Clinical Psychologist Michael Philp explains some of the processes involved and ways in which you can overcome avoidance to embrace challenge and accept the anxiety that comes with that challenge

In chapter 4, we delve into the "Encouragement Approach" where the philosopher states that there is a need to find the courage to do the tasks that one is avoiding. This approach dovetails neatly with Acceptance Commitment Therapy and here Clinical Psychologist Michael talks about the choice point, which is derived from ACT, and helps us to understand how to make "towards" moves - towards the life we want to live - while making room for the inevitable discomfort. He also offers a technique that can be helpful in managing that discomfort.

The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F... by Mark Manson is essentially a book about learning to stop comparing yourself to others and develop meaning in your life. It looks at how we get trapped in searching for happiness, and suggests that happiness is found in developing meaning and purpose in life. While it is a self-help book written by a non-expert, it channels theories related to Acceptance and Commitment Therapy as well as Logotherapy by Viktor Frankl (finding meaning and purpose). Here, Clinical Psychologist Michael has taken an excerpt from Chapter 4 The Value of Suffering. In that chapter, Manson recounts stories from famous people in terms of their experience of comparing themselves to others and the psychological torment that they experienced in the process. Michael discusses how we do this in our lives, the reasons why, and ways to overcome this need to compare to others in order to experience contentment.

The Courage To Be Disliked by Kishimi and Koga is a Japanese book about Western psychology. It is written as a dialogue between a philosopher and a student. The book aims to help people to manage anxiety and depression, by focusing on the moment, identifying what tasks are our own and what are others, and creating horizontal relationships instead of vertical ones. Here, Clinical Psychologist Michael has taken an excerpt from The Third Night, How to Separate Tasks which focuses on not worrying about what others may think of you and how we can apply this in our life in order to have freedom from worrying about fitting in, and as a result, more deep and meaningful connections with others.